4 Comments so far

1. Medical Jokes: Sandy

   Below are things that were actually written on patients’ charts at different hospitals and doctors’ offices.
   “Eyes are kinda matted with sleepy bugs.”
   “Patient separated with his wife and he’s also allergic to penicillin.”
   “Patient experiences difficulty swallowing tires easily.”
   “Patient was married twice but denies any other serious illness.”
   “After baby’s head was removed, the remainder was easily delivered.”
   “The patient is 72 years old. His mother is also elderly.”
   “The patient is a 62 year old woman who was at a flea market when she developed severe itching.”
   “Fetus is a male, no other gross abnormalities noted.”
   “Patient states he is in good health, except for his illness.”
   “Experienced mood swings because she suffered from PBS.”

2. Medical Jokes: ?Angelic Beauty?

   A pregnant woman gets into a car accident and falls into a deep coma.
   Asleep for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby.
   The doctor replies, “Ma’am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your brother came in and named them.”
   The woman thinks to herself, “Oh no, not my brother — he’s an idiot!” Expecting the worst, she asks the doctor, “Well, what’s the girl’s name?”
   “Denise,” the doctor says.
   The new mother thinks, “Wow, that’s not a bad name! Guess I was wrong about my brother. I like Denise!” Then she asks the doctor, “What’s the boy’s name?”
   The doctor replies, “DeNephew.”
   )

3. Medical Jokes: monocube

   A doctor walks into a waiting room and sees a little old lady waiting for him.
   What seems to be the problem? he asks.
   Doctor, my farts don’t smell. I know it sounds wierd, but I’ve started farting all the time, and it never smells. I’ve farted ten times while in this room and you can’t tell!
   The doctor nods, and writes her a prescription.
   Take these and come back in two weeks he tells her.
   Two weeks later the doctor walks into his waiting room and there is the old lady.
   Doctor! I don’t know what you did, but my farts smell now! They smell TERRIBLE! I’m still farting as often but it’s aweful! What did you do to me?
   Well, says the doctor, now that I’ve fixed your sinuses lets work on your bowels.

4. Medical Jokes: mad_hill

   there was this guy who was a chain smoker so he was having problems with his health, his doctor advised him to quit smoking.He didn’t take the advice,he was once smoking when the doctor appeared,at that time he had sipped the smoke in his mouth so he didn’t know what to do .He quickly unlit the cigarette under his feet but it was left with the smoke in his mouth.so the doctor asked him.How is your sickness?he said,hmmm doctor!the sickness has worsen,now when i open my mouth to talk smoke comes out of my mouth,and the smoke came out.